Friday, December 30, 2005

one down, one to go

so, the rehearsal dinner is behind me. i've got that one under my belt. i was really nervous for some reason. it was painless. i will say, however that the reunions between me and a couple of the old friends was...entertaining. i saw one guys that i thought, 'huh, he looks similar.' another guy that i thought, 'he looks nothing alike' the last one however was pretty funny... this reaction was, "holy crap, that can't be him!' it was so funny! i remember this kid from 10 years ago being pretty good looking, very polite and an all around nice kid. tonight however, he shined in a different light. my jaw hit the floor. i was in awe. time has done him well. he's also in the military so that's done some things for him as well. we talked for a bit and i'm not kidding, my sister and i agreed, he's the kind of guy that from across the room, you think, 'he's pretty good looking.' and then you get closer and thing, 'oh my gosh, he's perfect.' coming out here, i was looking forward to seeing a couple people. one guy in particular that i used to have a crush on, and i saw him and still thought, he's really great. but then my attention turned. it was the like the first guy didn't even phase me. it was great! i'll probably post some pictures from the wedding and i'll have to point him out. what's funnier though, is that i found myself having to conciously control my comments and remarks. it's so funny! i also would find myself just looking at him, not because i was...i don't know, it was just because i couldn't believe that the kid i knew was this man standing on stage. such an odd feeling. now, i have to see him in a tux tomorrow. this isn't going to be good. i have a whole new definition of 'eye candy.' ha ha ha

tim, if you read this, it's new years.... WOO HOO

here's a little side note as well. i think i'm going to start renting myself out as a 'brides' backbone.' i'm gonig to offer my services so that any bride that doesn't have the guts to stand up for herself, she can call me and i'll stand firm, no matter who i piss off. my cousins soon-to-be-wife is very passive. it's a wonderful trait. however, tonight at the church, they have a 'church coordinator', and if i had been the bride, i would have punched her in the face. a couple times. she never gave the option of a couple things. the flower girl and ring bearer won't be anywhere near the stage, no matter what the bride wants. the videographer (me) isn't allowed on stage to which i said, BITE ME. and the bridal party is standing in a circle. did you get that? in a CIRCLE it's the dumbest thing i've ever seen. i'm sorry but no. this woman is an idiot (the church coordinator) not kidding, i know its not my wedding, but i'm not holding back tomorrow. i'm standing up for the family and what they want. this woman said, "i'm hear to make everything less stressful for the pastor." WHAT?!?! it's not about the stupid pastor lady! it's about the bride and groom, the family and the marriage! get it straight. so, i make this vow to you. this will not happen, should i ever get married. she would be toothless by now if had been me on that stage. we'll see what tomorrow brings.

trying to figure out how to video tape a wedding, while not being on stage, and taping the bridal party standing in a circle, and NOT happy about it,


A CIRCLE PEOPLE! A CIRCLE. i could drive over there right now and punch her dead in the mouth. a circle. she should be drug out into the street and shot.

maybe the next one she does will be a square or octagon or perhaps and oval, i'm blown away.

Thursday, December 29, 2005

And so it begins

so, the trip has started. actually it started two days ago. i left granger indiana around 5.30am on tuesday the 27th. i am currently in the middle of nebraska for my cousins wedding. pretty much 1/3 of my driving has been done. come monday, i'll be on the road again and on my way to cali.

i'm in the middle of nebraska and i love it here. you'd never guess that a girl moving to LA would love a tiny little town with the population smaller that my church that i attend. it's weird to think it's the same size. everyone knows everyone. they have a gas station called the 'co-op' and you can actually pump gas and add it to a tab. no kidding. on top of that, they have a town square with the court house aand everything. it's mayberry, but cool. i love it here.

i used to have friends here, long ago. i used to come out here for summers and spring breaks because i thought it was such a fun place to be. that makes me laugh. they have farm cats and gravel roads and i love it. i could live here. but i love LA too. it's an odd thing. out of a couple summers i spent a couple weeks on a trip called, "travel camp." it was incredible. i loved it and to this day find myself telling rediculously funny stories about the shenanigans that happened in the confines of the bus or the 'hilary' tent. it's very funny to me. i don't really know anyone here any more. it was a lot more fun when i knew people. mostly everyone has grown up, moved on, gotten married and had a couple of kids, if not one, than more. i'll see a few of the guys that i went on travel camp with tomorrow, at the rehearsal dinner. i have mixed feelings. i'm excited to see them, but i've changed, they;ve changed and really, we may have absolutely nothing to talk about. but i guess we'll always have the shenanigans of the, 'love shack,' 'the hilary,' and everything else that no one should know about. we'll see how it goes, it makes me nervous to see these people. what if i'm not what they remember and what if they aren't what i remember? it's a very nerve racking feeling. not that it matters, i probably won't hear from any of them for the next 20 years after this weekend. we all have lives, right?

we all had dinner at may cousin joes house tonight, it's weird because when i was growing up, that's the house my aunt marilyn lived in and it's nothing a like, it's very surreal. you drive onto the farm and everything is the same, but you walk into the house and nothing is the same. i realized after dinner tonight that this was the first time in a very VERY long time that we were all together. it was like and odd, and HAPPY, family reunion. everyone was laughing and telling stories. this doesn't happen where everyone is there, we're always missing at least a couple. they only people missing are my brothers wife, and his girls, which, they've really never been to a family reunion so, oddly it wasn't weird that they weren't there. if that makes any sense. and i sat there at the table thinking, 'this is what family is, or at least it's what it's supposed to be.' when i was in high school, i loved the movie, 'while you were sleeping.' and there is a line in there where the father says, "for one moment, everything is right. everyone is happy and for that one moment, you have peace." and that's where i was at tonight. i sat there thinking, 'i miss this.' we used to do it every year and people get busy and it hasn't happened as often lately. but for that one moment, we had peace. or at least i did.

then, we get back to the hotel and my sister mentions it's the 29th. which, i knew yesterday that today was the 29th, but it never occurred to me throughout the day. i guess, that's the best way to spend it. i think this is the first time that it's gone by without me noticing. it's an odd feeling. today marks, 16 years to the day that my dad died. i've officiallay lived 2/3s of my life without him. odd.

more on the travel and adventures later. i'm sure i'll have stories from the wedding.


Monday, December 19, 2005

i seriously wonder sometimes how members of my family have made it so far without becoming heavy drinkers. the stress, the anxiety! THE DRAMA!

i was sitting in a movie with my mom the other day and one of the previews had a line where a girl showed up at her moms front door and she was crying and her mom opens the door and says, "come in honey, i'll put a pot of burbon on." and i thought, this should be our family greeting. we aren't drinkers. it's never really been a large part of any of our lives...immediately any way, and i think i might start a new tradition...

considering drinking heavily in order to calm my frazzled nerves,

Sunday, December 18, 2005

i got the job.

when i got the job i was over joyed! then about two hours later i got the 'i'm going to throw up' feeling. the next morning i was excited again and as the departure date nears, i'm getting the puke feeling back again.

i'm moving to irvine california. just south of LA.

oh, and i leave in a week... no pressure!

i think the plan is that i'm leaving the morning of the 25th driving all day on the 25th, 26th, and 27th and dropping my car off at LAX, then flying back to omaha for the wedding and then after the wedding, flying back to LA for training on the 2nd. i'm a little stressed and may have a severe case of ulsers...

i have to go pack... and plan the road trip and plan my move and plan every other aspect of my life for the next 6 weeks....

Monday, December 12, 2005

okay okay, i'm still alive

here's the deal...still no real news.

i just had my final interview with apple tonight. we should know by friday.

if i do get the job...i move in three weeks. THREE WEEKS PEOPLE. freaky.

so, if anyone knows of anyone who needs a roommate in LA or has a really cheap house for rent, let me know. i come heavy, one golden retreiver and one calico cat. the last two items seem to be my issue in finding housing...we'll see how this goes.


Sunday, December 04, 2005

okay, okay, i threatened my aunt barb about not posting and then i didn't post. what do you want from me??!

anyway, here i am. no real news. i should have my final job interview with apple in the next couple days. it was supposed to be this past friday but it had to be rescheduled. so, i'm hoping it's tomorrow. i'll keep you all updated on my news...but sadly, as of right now, i don't really have any news.

"just one more reason i'm not having kids"

so, i'm talking to my sister on the phone on saturday and i hear my nephew crying in the background. becky says he has a stomach ache, and we keep talking for a few minutes. all of a sudden, i hear, "BBBAAAAAARRRRRFFFFF" in the background and a split scond later becky says, "ah!, i gotta go!" and then hangs up on me. i like to pretend that he was just playing. the thought of vomit makes me want to...vomit. i'm a sympathy puker, what do you want from me.

should i ever have kids, and should they get to the point of projectile vomit, i will personally purchase a plane ticket for tammy, daryl, or becky to fly out and handle the situation. (i would include adam, but lets face it, he's more of a wuss than i am!) :o) take that.

until next time america,