a brief break from my blogging hiatus to congratulate one of my best friends MEREDITH who got ENGAGED tonight! I'm so excited and she had the best reaction ever when mike got down on one knee. i love meredith and she's amazing and she's getting married. amazing.




back to my hiatus. more pictures later.

okay, again, this begins with a warning: this isn't alarming. i'm going to vent a bit. it's kind of a connection from the previous post.

have you ever felt like your life isn't really yours? your time isn't yours? that's where i am right now. i feel like i'm owned by the company that i work for and when i leave there, i'm owned by the people i'm working for. it sucks. my normal job, i don't have normal days off. every week is different, my days off are never the same and they are rarely together. the days off i do have, i'm working contract work.

i know, i know i've done this to myself. and my plan is to undo it. i'm working on it. i've set unrealistic expectations for myself.

it's a bad feeling when you feel like you're living a life that's not yours. it's a worse feeling when you feel like you're owned by someone/some corporation.

i may not blog for abit. i'm needing to reprioritize my life for a while. i'm going to be journaling all of this but it'll be some things that i won't want to post to the whole web. i'll post some highlights once i've reached the other side. i've set myself a time deadline to make changes in my life. i've wasted too much time up til now. i've let myself become a hermit because of work and i don't like it. i have to listen to voice mail instead of talk to people because of horrible work hours and i feel like i've let the relationships in my life that matter most, fall short. and to all of you i've done that to, i'm so sorry. i've been a bad friend. you know who you are...you've all recently had a relationship with just my voicemail. aparently i can't balance.

i've started a longer list of things i'm adding into my life, you know, things i actually want in my life. who would have thought that was a possibility. so here's the question... what are the things in your life that make you feel the most fulfilled? things that i can add to my life, i'm taking suggestions.

p.s. met a guy and he may TOTALLY be one of those things i add into my life. we'll see.

until next time america.