a non typical thursday night

today was a pretty good day over all. i actually felt some what healthy and that's always a great beginning.

i got to work with freida today. i love this woman. she is so hysterical. she makes me laugh all the time. the sarcasm between the two of us is so thick that you need to wear boots around us. it's so hilareous. 'yeah, like i want to answer the phone right now. do i look like i have nothing else going on?' she slays me.

after work was the pre-church non-dinner at the mall. normally we have time to actually eat at the food court, not for me this evening. i got there and then about five minutes later had to go to church. we had a guest worship leader tonight so the church was packed! it was awesome. about ten minutes after i get there my sister comes walking up to me with her next 'victim.' another poor, very attractive, young man that she is trying to convince that he needs to date me. i seriously must seem like the biggest charity case! i feel so pathetic! so i, of course, introduce myself. 'hi, nice to meet you, i guess we're supposed to get married.' not gonna lie, it always seems to work like a charm! (if only you knew how hard i was laughing about that) poor guy didn't know what he was getting into when he heard the, 'have i told you about my sister' comment. however, i think he's spoken for. i think he's dating a girl who flatters him with gifts...i don't really know.

then, i'm standing there and i recognize this guy standing across the room. it was chris nunley! and then his wife peggy stood up and peggy was there too! i was so excited. i know them from camp but also because they are the parents of my great friend sarah miller of warsaw. :) it was so great to see them! they seriously are the funniest parents i think i could know. they just make me laugh all the time. i love them! it was such a great thing to see them there! they were at church for the icc conference.

THEN, the best worship i've taken part in, in a very long time. i just love this guy who was leading worship and i think he's incredibly talented. it amazes me how, when someone so talented leads worship it allows you to take your focus off of everything else and just pour yourself into it. there are great leaders at gcc. i think jason miller is phenominal! there is another guy that i don't know his name but i think he's so incredible too. it's amazing to me how God can use someone to help so many people come to Christ in worship. what a gift. INCREDIBLE NIGHT! i think the guys name is charlie hall/hill. he's pretty well known and incredibly talented. i cant even put into words how amazing it was. WOW.

then, it was off to home and back to getting things checked of the 'to do' list before the weekend. i got about half way done with half of the things last night and then...the power went out. i loved it! it was like a forced stopping point. anyway, i'm off to conquer the world, or at least the bedroom.

captain of clean,
katie

i'm katie, and i'm high maintenance.

i've discovered lately that i am a high maintenence girl. i never would haave thought this of myself until recently. i've been the jeans and t-shirt kind of girl all my life. in fact, i'm still there. sure i like getting dolled up when there is an occasion. however, just recently, i have enjoyed getting my first facial and first FULL BODY massage. it was like a little heaven on earth. i'm not going to lie. from now on. all birthdays, christmas, easter, secretaries day. this is what i'll be doing. when i get married, i will register for a massage. it'll be great!

so, i decided after that whole massage thing that i really am a high maintenence girl. this could be the event that wakes the girly beast within me. i used to be proud of the fact that i could be ready to walk out the door in 20 minutes. including shower, shave my legs, wash my hair and makeup. 20 minutes! those days are in the past. a

it pains me to say this but i may be becoming...a girly girl.

yikes

what if the 'hokey pokey' really is what it's all about?

so, i'm still sick. i found out today that the surgery will be october 21st. i got off the phone and cried. i seriously doubt that i will live another three weeks. i keep just taking more drugs and hoping for the best. i know that you're not really supposed to use that nose spray stuff for longer than three days but it has become my new best friend. without it, i have no air flow and i'm pretty sure that's just killing off my brain cells.

i know that i'm a wuss. i know that in the big picture, my sickness is nothing. it's a cold, and a sad one at that. people are dealing with cancer and doing it a lot more fearless than i with my cold. my uncle had a kidney AND pancreas transplant and i never heard a single complaint, in fact i remember only hearing praises coming from him. and here i am in my sad and pathetic sick state whining about a cold. i apologize for being such a wuss. i also believe though, that other people are given stronger diseases because they are stronger people to deal with them. my moms friend is on her second kind of cancer and still jokes about it! i think that the reason that God hasn't given me a worse sickness to deal with, is because i couldn't deal with it. i would die. three months of a stuffy nose and cold symptoms and i'm ready to jump off a bridge, i can't imagine having to go through something physically painful. God bless the people who can be strong when someone like i would be weak. those people truly amaze me.

ive decided that i need a vacation. it's been since march and quite frankly, i'm feeling the itch. i'm still in the i-have-no-money-for-anything-other-than-bills stage of life right now, so i won't be going any time soon but i'm seriously starting my planning process. i'm picturing sitting on the beach for four or five days just sitting there. me and my ipod and no cell phone. i'd love to go to fiji or florida or san diego. i love san diego. i've got the itch, i need to go soon.

here is my new tangent. i hate talking on the phone. hate it. let me clarify though before i lose friends. i love my friends and family. love hearing about their lives and their days. love hearing their voices. my day gets better when i get to hear their voices. however, i hate talking on the phone. i think it's because it's so impersonal. you know? i've got this battery operated device to my ear, i'd rather be sitting across the table from the person. i really hate it when people call for no reason, again, let me clarify. to call and say, 'just wanted to say hi, was thinking about you' that's great. to call and say, 'what's going on?' 'nothing' 'what's going on with you?' 'nothing' I HATE IT. i don't understand the whole thing. it just kills me!!!

okay, i lied. one more tangent. i am in NO hurry to get married. i seem to have a circle of people around me that seem to believe that my life is not whole because i am not married. oh no. i am happy being single. i LOVE not having to check in with someone. sure, i want to be married - in the future. but i'm 24. i love that i can throw the dog in the jeep and go. i don't have to check schedules with anyone if i don't want to. call me a loner but i love having my independence. i'm looking forward to being married. i can't wait to share my life with someone. it'll be great to throw the dog and the husband in to the jeep and go but i am at a stage in my life right now that i'm having fun. i don't have a real career, i'm not in a serious relationship and i can focus on what i want when i want. i love it. i think that if God wants me married, he'll introduce me to the right man. but i also don't think i'm ready for married life. i recently got to spend time with my great friend Amber and her husband Ryan and i LOVED watching them together. it was so funny to see what amber was in high school and see who she has become. it amazes me. she cooks, she cleans and she loves him in everything she does. when i get married i want a relationship like amber and ryan. my sister and sister-in-law can't seem to understand that i am in no such hurry. if you know my sister and you're a single male, not related to me, you've heard the phrase, "have i told you about my sister." i'm not kidding, i must seem like the most desperate charity case known to the world right now. or at least to my church. anyone associated with the band or drama has heard about beckys sister. my concern is that now, no one is going to want to meet me because, lets face it, my older sister is trying to get me dates. i think that if i were that...motivated to be in a relationship right now, i'd be out there meeting guys and investing in relationships, the problem is, it's not my top priority. i made it that for too long and now, i'm shifting my priorities. call me crazy but i think i'll put my focus else where for now.

so, now that that is off my chest. i'm off to design a t-shirt... i have a couple ideas. 1. single and fabulous 2. single and loving it 3. seriously high maintenance 4. i'm the sister becky's been bugging you about.

feel free to vote. ;O)

what if the 'hokey pokey' really is what it's all about?

so, i'm still sick. i found out today that the surgery will be october 21st. i got off the phone and cried. i seriously doubt that i will live another three weeks. i keep just taking more drugs and hoping for the best. i know that you're not really supposed to use that nose spray stuff for longer than three days but it has become my new best friend. without it, i have no air flow and i'm pretty sure that's just killing off my brain cells.

i know that i'm a wuss. i know that in the big picture, my sickness is nothing. it's a cold, and a sad one at that. people are dealing with cancer and doing it a lot more fearless than i with my cold. my uncle had a kidney AND pancreas transplant and i never heard a single complaint, in fact i remember only hearing praises coming from him. and here i am in my sad and pathetic sick state whining about a cold. i apologize for being such aa wuss. i also believe though, that other people are given stronger diseases because they are stronger people to deal with them. my moms friend is on her second kind of cancer and still jokes about it! i think that the reason that God hasn't given me a worse sickness to deaal with, is because i couldn't deal with it. i would die. three months of a stuffy nose and cold symptoms and i'm ready to jump off a bridge, i can't imagine having to go through something physically painful. God bless the people who can be strong when someone like i would be weak. those people truly amaze me.

ive decided that i need a vacation. it's been since march and quite frankly, i'm feeling the itch. i'm still in the i-have-no-money-for-anything-other-than-bills stage of life right now, so i won't be going any time soon but i'm seriously starting my planning process. i'm picturing sitting on the beach for four or five days just sitting there. me and my ipod and no cell phone. i'd love to go to fiji or florida or san diego. i love san diego. i've got the itch, i need to go soon.

here is my new tangent. i hate talking on the phone. hate it. let me clarify though before i lose friends. i love my friends and family. love hearing about their lives and their days. love hearing their voices. my day gets better when i get to hear their voices. however, i hate talking on the phone. i think it's because it's so impersonal. you know? i've got this battery operated device to my ear, i'd rather be sitting across the table from the person. i really hate it when people call for no reason, again, let me clarify. to call and say, 'just wanted to say hi, was thinking about you' that's great. to call and say, 'what's going on?' 'nothing' 'what's going on with you?' 'nothing' I HATE IT. i don't understand the whole thing. it just kills me!!!

okay, i lied. one more tangent. i am in NO hurry to get married. i seem to have a circle of people around me that seem to believe that my life is not whole because i am not married. oh contrare. i am happy being single. i LOVE not having to check in with someone. sure, i want to be married - in the future. but i'm 24. i love that i can throw the dog in the jeep and go. i don't have to check schedules with anyone if i don't want to. call me a loner but i love having my independence. i'm looking forward to being married. i can't wait to share my life with someone. it'll be great to throw the dog and the husband in to the jeep and go but i am at a stage in my life right now that i'm having fun. i don't have a real career, i'm not in a serious relationship and i can focus on what i want when i want. i love it. i think that if God wants me married, he'll introduce me to the right man. but i also don't think i'm ready for married life. i recently got to spend time with my great friend Amber and her husband Ryan and i LOVED watching them together. it was so funny to see what amber was in high school and see who she has become. it amazes me. she cooks, she cleans and she loves him in everything she does. when i get married i want a relationship like amber and ryan. my sister and sister-in-law can't seem to understand that i am in no such hurry. if you know my sister and you're a single male, not related to me, you've heard the phrase, "have i told you about my sister." i'm not kidding, i must seem like the most desperate charity case known to the world right now. or at least to my church. anyone associated with the band or drama has heard about beckys sister. my concern is that now, no one is going to want to meet me because, lets face it, my older sister is trying to get me dates. i think that if i were that...motivated to be in a relationship right now, i'd be out there meeting guys and investing in relationships, the problem is, it's not my top priority. i made it that for too long and now, i'm shifting my priorities. call me crazy but i think i'll put my focus else where for now.

so, now that that is off my chest. i'm off to design a t-shirt... i have a couple ideas. 1. single and fabulous 2. single and loving it 3. seriously high maintenence 4. i'm the sister becky's been bugging you about.

feel free to vote. ;O)

the highlight of my day.

last tuesday while i was at work, i recieved a FABULOUS suprise. someone sent me flowers at work. it made my day! they were gorgeous! they still are, and they are brightening my day every time i walk into the house. thank you!

Oprah!

the next morning, amber woke me up at 5:15. 5:15! (sorry oprah, but this better be good.) so we got ready for the show, she taught me how to do make up. amber is a sells mary kay and is very very talented. if you need anything, call her. who knew there was such an art to putting on eye makeup. 24 years later, i finally learn!

6:00 am, we're out the door and on our way. we jumped onto the 290 heading into chicago. normally this road is like a death trap waiting to happen because everyone and their brother calls each other and says, "okay, leave...NOW!" and they are all on this road at the same time. but it was fairly smooth. we found the studio pretty easily and there was a line around the building at 6:45! are these people sick?!? amber and i decided that food would be good so we start looking for a mcdonalds. there are only 4.5 million of them in the city of chicago and on this morning we couldn't find a single one. we drove around for what seemed like and hour (about 10 minutes) and then settled on dunkin donuts. after we grabbed some food, we jumped back into the jeep and headed back to the studio. amber jumped in line while i delt with the bitter parking lot guy and we were on our way.

once we were inside we had to wait in this room that i think, before the studio make over, allowed the studio audience to sit while they were waiting to go into the studio. now that the new studio seats more people, there is standing room only. it wasn't pretty. so we waited in there for about 45 minutes...standing between A LOT of women. some of which, i'm not going to lie to you, i thought were men. so about 40 minutes into the waiting game, they start announcing names over the PA system to come down to the studio doors for pre seating. i thought this was like what they do for the airlines where old and 'larger' customers get seated first to assure their safty and comfort. this wasn't the case. during the third round of names, amber looks at me and says, i have a feeling that they are going to call your name. sure enough..."kathryn holt" so off we went to the studio.

when we got down there, they walked us in and there were probably 8 people in there before us. the woman says, "just two of you, follow me." so we walk and she points to these seats...third row, center. this is impossible! we are 10 feet away from the couch that oprah herself sits on. during the ricky martin concert oprah was two chairs in front of me! two chairs! it was unbelieveable! it was absolutely amazing. during the 'pre show' the show manager was trying to warm up the crowd and was asking who had come the farthest and who got up the earliest. a lot of women had gotten up at 4! we got up at 5. the worst was that there was one woman that yelled, "i was so excited that i got in line at 4:45!" amber and i just looked at each other and started laughing. we had MUCH better seats than this woman but we decided to keep our mouths shut.

once the show started it was so cool! oprah was interviewing ricky martin about an organization that he had founded called people for children. he's trying to bring awareness to the childhood prostitution and sex trafficing. it's pretty impressive. i'm completely blown away by what he's been doing. this is an 11 billion dollar a year industry. it's third under drug trafficing and weapon trafficing. and 80% of the customers are AMERICAN TOURISTS. how horrible is that! for the land of opportunity we sure are robbing a lot of little girls and boys of their promising futures. it seriously makes me sick. i'm so impressed with ricky martin.

i seriously turned into a 12 year old girl when he was on stage. i'm so proud of myself. i think he's just getting better with age, like a fine wine. ha ha ha. while he was on stage talking with oprah he was wearing a button down shirt un buttoned pretty far. amber claims she saw his zyphoid process! i just looked at her and laughed. then, during the concert he was wearing this army green tshirt that said 'i believe' on the left breast. i kept thinking back to when my friends and i used to wear our 'i believe' tshirts while in high school. every third friday of the month...i think. but then i thought, this is ricky martin. it could be, "i believe in...traffic. school. home. clouds." who knows. it's a broad statement. however when he then turned to the side so that he could shake his hips and do his dance, i noticed that on his sleeve was an image of Jesus. i was speechless. i believe. and i believe that he believes. i was very impressed with the whole day.

by the way. ricky martin winked at me. seriously. amber can back it up... HHHH HHHH FFFFFFFF (high hopes fulfilled)

after the show we went back to la grange and had lunch at chipotle. love it! and amber and i had what i consider to be one of the best conversations we have had in years. i won't go into details but it amazes me that we started so similarly, kindergarten at mary frank. middle school at schmucker. high school at penn. i went to calvin. she went to hope. (rival schools i might add) she got married and i worked for camp. so many different paths and yet we're in a lot of the same places in life. it amazes me. i am so thankful for amber. i am so thankful for a friend that i can pour my heart out to and know that she'll just smile at me and accept it. she and i went through our love/hate times of our friendship through the 20 years we have known each other but i am so glad that we stuck it out. it was completely worth it.

very convienient that amber and i have been friends for 20 years and this was oprahs 20th year...odd and yet fabulous.

and with that novel, i shall bid you good night. it's 2:10 am so i guess that would be good morning.

good morning.
katie

•on this past monday i watched the season premiere of oprah. her guest was jennifer aniston. i love jennifer aniston. i think that if i could take on the physical attributes of anyone, she would be my first choice. i also love that she seems to treat people so well. obviously she talked a bit about the break up and then if she's happy and ready to date again. one statement that she made stuck with me though. she said, "i was at yoga the other day and got this feeling like i've never had before. i looked at my friend and said, 'there isn't another place i'd rather be or thing i'd rather be doing." and i thought to myself, when was the last time that i felt that content in my life that i wasn't thinking about what was coming up or the next move i needed to make in my life. i couldn't think of a time. i was so upset by this. when did i lose my contentment?

last week on tuesday night, i was looking at oprah's website. i clicked on this thing that said, "do you like ricky martin?" and my response was, "i'm not a huge fan of his music but i love that he stepped out of hollywood and the spotlight to do mission work in indonesia for the last four years." i entered my phone number and email address and thought nothing of it.

the next morning at work i got a phone call from...the oprah show, "we'd like you to come to the show next wednesday to see ricky martin." i was so excited! i know, it's ricky martin and i liked him when i was in middle/high school but how cool was this?!?? so they asked me who i was going to bring with me and i said instantly, "amber beeson, i mean cox." (i always seem to forget shes married! sorry ryan :) ) so then i called my mom, she said, "oprah! i want to go! who is on?" i said, "ricky martin." she said, "take your sister." seriously. so then, because my sisster had to work, i called amber.

"amber, what are you doing on wednesday?"
"i don't know, why? i'll be in chicago."
"wanna go to oprah?"
"what?!? i can't get too excited right now, i'm in a furniture store."

and the conversation went on from there.

so we made plans for me to go spend the night at her house with her and her husband in chicago before the show and then leave early in the morning to get to the studio by 7!!!

so, i arrived at their house on tuesday night, in time for dinner. amber made (AMBER MADE) dinner. i was so impressed. this from the girl who said, "thank you for the pots and pans, now i have to learn to cook" at her bridal shower. a very delicious veggie lasagna. after dinner, ryan took off for the library and amber and i stayed at her house and i made her be creative. it was pretty funny. she actually started shaking. it was so much fun. about halfway through the night i realized, wow, i honestly, wouldn't rather be anywhere else but here. it was so nice to be in the presence of someone so great as amber. i love this girl so much and cherish her so much and it was like my heart and my brain just both agreed that this is where i was supposed to be. it was so amazing.

this picture sums up the relationship between kitty and cali

I should be writing a book.

because i've been sick lately, i've had to take sleeping pills. while they help me sleep, they also have very...odd effects. for example i've been having many more dreams lately. odd ones too. last night, foor example, i had a dream that the store i was working for was going to be robbed. i was having this argument with this woman in the parking lot and she said that she was going to rob the store! we both just started running as fast as we could to the store. about half way through the parking lot, i thought, "i should just kick her." so i did. in my dream, i did a tae-bo-like side kick. in real life however, i did a front kick as hard as i could while lying under the covers. it's like all my old and forgotten soccer skills came rushing back to me just in time to save the scrapbook store. well, my cat, affecitionately named kitty, was asleep on the bed. not for long however. as i kicked the woman in the dream, i kicked the covers on my bed which in turn, kicked the cat. she, completely alarmed having been woken up in the middle of a deep sleep, went flying into the air hissing and meowing like she had been attacked by a wild boar. she then launched herself from my bed to the dresser knocking over the picture frames and vases as she went. she then continuned to run around the parimiter of the room from printer to desk to couch to coffee table then up the stairs. this then caused the dog to wake up stirring in her the need to chase the cat up the stairs and out the dog door. i then laid in bed laughing myself back to sleep. poor kitty, she scares so easily. she has since recovered.

dreaming deep,
katie

i forgot to mention last night that i had an interesting phone call today. i went to check my voice mail and got this message. it was this guy singing. i just sat there trying to figure out who it was. my phone was a bit staticy, if you will, so it wasn't the easiest of tasks. so the song was, "my body lies over the ocean..." and i couldn't really tell who it was...then the next thing he says is, "hey, that reminds me of this other song..." and begins to sing a different tune..."Lawrence, Lawrence of Arabia, British guy come to fight the turkish"

I knew it! it was my HYSTERICAL uncle mark. you threw me for a loop! i was driving down the road, with the top down, and at the exact moment that i stop at a stop sign (where families were waiting to cross the road) you start singing, "lawrence..." i laughed so hard and loud, these families looked at me like i was crazy (which they are not far off). so i had to share that part of my day yesterday. it was a highlight!

i'm brainstorming for a funny song to leave on your voice mail...this should be good...

here to fight the turkish,
k

so, its been a while since i've posted. i've been running around like mad. working tons of hours and trying to get my life back in order after being sick for so long. it's still hard for me to get out of bed or even go up a flight of stairs but i think that feeling is fading. i don't know if it's that i've been sick for so long or that i'm still on an unreasonable amount of medication. we shall see come tuesday when the meds run out and i've got another appointment with the specialist.

my day started with a, "katie! i need help! i have to leave for my meeting in an hour and i just froze the computer!" so i come upstairs and with a quick "control, alt, delete" free up my moms computer. then she's panicing about different things for the meeting and about an hour later heads out the door for her meeting with her people to people group in elkart (my brother in law, adam, refers to them as her 'peeps'). about five minutes after she left i noticed that she forgot some papers on the kitchen counter so i immediately pick up the phone and call her cell phone. sure enough it rings...in the next room. AHHHHHHH. so, i jump in my car, strike that, JEEP and head to the meeting. as i walk in, she says, 'oh, those are the bad ones, i don't need them.' so then i headed home.

as i got home, i felt a bit motivated and felt like i needed to clean the garage so that my mom and i could both park in there. after i got the jeep she has pretty much just let me park in the garage so i wouldn't have to put the top up every night. she's so good to me. sure you can live in my house with your LARGE dog, (who recently ate the carpet, by the way) and go ahead and park in the garage, i'll park in the drive way. it's amazing how one person can be so giving. so, for the next 5-6 hours, i cleaned the garage. we now successfully park two cars in there. and the inventor of the two car garage rests happily in his grave.

the rest of my night i have been babysitting at my sisters house. i have a new rule for anyone who asks me to babysit. if i don't have at least a 48 hour notice, it's an imediate, "no." i know, i'm a jerk but there is just this feeling when you get asked two hours before like the rest of your day is shot. it's not like i normaly have plans but it would be great if people thought i might. anyway, beck asked me far in advance and i happily said yes. she even offered to let me use her scrapbook stuff and i'm resisting. i've been bloggin instead. :o) so i'm babysitting jacob (6) and abby (4). if you'd like to read about my evening of being proven to be of a lesser intelligence than my niece and nephew, you can catch up on that at beckycallender.blogspot.com. that's my sisters blog. anything that she says about me is false. :)

and with that i bid you good night. i have to wait for the elders to return before i can leave. adult supervision my eye.

katie

i'm back! im feeling much better lately, health wise. i'm off most of my drugs which is a good sign. so far so good. and, lucky me, i don't have a cocaine addiction...or at least not that i know of.

on one of the days that i just needed to get out of the house, i made a trip to the dollar theatre. when i got there, nothing was really showing except this movie 'crash'. i had heard of it and i knew that sandra bullock was in it but that's all i knew. it's about 12 or so people that live in los angeles and throughout the next 48 hours their paths all cross and their lives all crash into each other. the theory behind the movie is that it opens with this quote, "it's the sense of touch, you know? in real cities you walk and brush past each other and people bump into you. But in LA, no body touches you. we're always behind this metal and glass." i didn't really know what to think going into it. the first five minutes were a bit awkward. in the first five minutes, you hear so many negative stereotypes. i was sitting in a theatre of so many different people and so many ethnicities that i didn't know what to do, i'm sure that my whole body clenched. but by the end of the movie, you really see that it addresses so many things. it was incredible! i recommend it. there is one part where sandra bullock is talking to her best friend of the phone and she says, "i don't know i'm angry at nick, i'm angry at maria, i'm mad at this person and that person. and i realized that it has nothing to do with the car being stolen, i wake up angry every day and i don't know why. i'm always mad, and i..." and her friend cuts her off and says, hey let me call you back. it's like sandra is pouring her heart out looking for anyone to prove that they care about her and she is neglected by the person she loves the most. it really hit home with me. after that phone call she slips and falls down the stairs and later in the movie you see her laying in bed talking on the phone to her husband the DA of los angeles, and she was saying how she called her best friend because she fell and couldn't move and her friend couldn't come to help because she was getting a massage. her maid (whom she yelled at and hated the entire movie) ended up taking her to the ER and was taking care of her while she was in bed. when her maid leaned in to help her sit up, sandra clasps onto her and says, "you want to know something crazy? you're my best friend in the whole world." it just is so true of how lonely people are. i understood it very well.

on that note, i'm going to go to bed. big day at the scrapbook store.

a couple of prayer requests. my friend dustin is due to leave shortly for iraq. he is leaving his wife and year and a half year old daughter behind and he'll be gone for six months. i know that he would appreciate all the prayers we can send him.

also a friend of mine from the store, her father had a stroke this weekend so if you could keep her and her family in your prayers as well.

and obviously, the thousands of people who have been effected by the hurricane. the police men and women have been so effected that many of them have killed themselves to get away from it all. please pray for them. i can't imagine. if i could afford it, i would be in the car, on my way to new orleans with a boat to help the search and recovery that is going on. i still don't believe that i have accepted that it has happened in the US. on top of that, i saw an interview of a survivor and she kept saying, "what is left to believe in? where can i find hope?" i just pray that God uses people close to the site to show his strength and love. these people need love right now. love and hope.

you can live a week without food. a few days without water. a couple minutes without air. but you can't survive at all without hope. it's such a powerful thing.

i pray that you are all safe.

until all have heard
k